Unnamed Client

Bill* was the worst client we've ever worked with. He was unpleasant, overbearing and arrogant and try as we might, we never found a heart of gold beneath his gruff exterior. Which isn't to say we didn't do a good job for him; in fact, we were too scared of him to do anything but our level best.

After exhaustively interviewing him about his rather obscure professional service, we teased out a pretty strong news hook, one that we took to the highest levels of American media. Cold-calling the Wall Street Journal was far less intimidating than telling Bill* that his company was beneath their notice. To our surprise, the Journal took the bait and ran a feature on his market niche, highlighting the company front and center. In less than four months, success followed success: CNBC ran a feature, as did the Detroit Free Press, KGO-AM and Investor's Business Daily.

Bill* did not share our satisfaction. The upshot? We were fired. Seems Bill* decided to try out one of the large PR firms that had been calling him ever since – ironically – they began reading about him in the media. The loss of the monthly retainer was immeasurably outweighed by the relief of not having to work with him again. But that wasn't the end of the story.

Ten months after getting axed, we received a phone call from Bill*, who got right to the point, "None of these PR firms" - he had been through two in ten months – "is worth a god-damn. You’re the only one who ever did anything".

We declined his offer to work with him again. And we did so another six months down the line. Being fired has never felt sweeter. And if you're a prospective client reading this, don't worry…you are not now nor never will be as bad as Bill*.

* Name changed in the interest of discretion

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